Relationship Therapy

I use a structured, yet flexible, approach when I begin working with new relationship therapy clients. This initial period may vary as we explore the therapeutic modalities that work best for you, based on your unique attachment, culture, neurodiversity (learning, expressing, processing, integrating, etc.), needs, and challenges. 

Here is an example of what the first few sessions of relationship therapy may look like: 

First, I would like to get to know you. Learn the history of your relationship; the loving times, as well as the distant ones. We will review your strengths and struggles, what you have tried that has helped and not helped. We will explore your patterns of communication and relating to one another. Together, we will develop goals to create a path forward. 

Next, I meet individually with each member of the relationship. Here, we identify what is the hardest for you to say/do, and how I can support you the most during future sessions. We will explore your ancestral and family history, important relationships in your life, and how the dynamics of these relationships intersect with those in relationship therapy. 

Then, we review themes from our individual sessions. We begin to lean into difficult conversations and enact what a typical conflict looks like in the relationship. We will summarize and reflect on discussed themes, and share our impressions about the challenges identified. Together, we create a plan for future sessions.

Here is an example of how I organize a typical relationship therapy session:

At the BEGINNING of a session, we start with a brief check-in and explore moments of connection or contention since our last session. We will identify what to focus on based on your immediate needs and/or the goals in your relationship plan. We may start with a grounding exercise, further debrief a previous session, or even continue an exercise/practice from a previous session to deepen the work. 

DURING a session, I employ both active and passive interventions. Some examples of active interventions include: practicing of active listening skills, role-playing, interrupting an escalating conflict, asking challenging questions, calling-in an unhelpful communication pattern, directing one member to speak to the other, and recommend homework. Some examples of passive interventions include: teaching of frameworks and grounding techniques, active listening, reflective statements, and asking clarifying questions.

At the END of each session, I debrief by asking questions from the Session Rating Scale, or other client feedback questionnaire, to collaboratively assess how therapy is going. Here, we often discuss highlights from the session, moments of attunement or misattunement, and share mutually relevant feedback.

In my experience, clients who have participated in weekly relationship therapy have more readily and effectively achieved their goals. One reason for this is, in my observation and opinion, a more attuned focus on the change behaviors necessary to achieve the goals of relationship therapy. The more time between sessions, the greater risk of reverting to unhelpful communication patterns and/or micro-misattunements that can lead to deeper ruptures in the relationship(s).  

I do see clients in relationship therapy on a bi-weekly (every other week) basis. I inform these clients of the risks of this frequency, and the absolute importance of each client holding themselves accountable to change behaviors, skills and/or homework between sessions. 

I typically see clients bi-weekly (every other week) or even monthly, when they have maintained progress and/or we are nearing the end of relationship therapy because they are achieving and maintaining their goals. 

My fees are: 

• $230 for a 60-minute, two-person session (couple, parent-child, friend-friend, etc.), 
• $260 for a 60-minute, three-or-more person session (polycule, family, chosen-family, etc.).

Good Faith Estimate Notice: You have the right to receive a “Good Faith Estimate” explaining how much your medical and mental health care will cost. Under the law, health care providers need to give patients who don’t have insurance or who are not using insurance an estimate of the expected charges for medical services, including psychotherapy services. You have the right to receive a Good Faith Estimate for the total expected cost of any non-emergency healthcare services, including psychotherapy services. You can ask your healthcare provider, and any other provider you choose, for a Good Faith Estimate before you schedule a service. If you receive a bill that is at least $400 more than your Good Faith Estimate, you can dispute the bill. Make sure to save a copy or picture of your Good Faith Estimate. For questions or more information about your right to a Good Faith Estimate, visit www.cms.gov/nosurprises. 

I accept payments of cash, check, debit/credit card, and FSA card at the time of service. 

No, I am not empanelled with any insurance company. I am an Out of Network Provider (OON) and can provide superbills for you to seek reimbursement from your insurance provider.